Crossing the Lines Read online

  “All right. Thank you. I’ll come,” Simon finally answers, sounding very formal.

  Luke just smiles and digs into his food again. I’m not sure how I feel about this. On one hand, I’m happy that Luke likes Simon enough to want him there for his birthday. On the other, I’m not sure it’s a good thing if my son becomes attached. It’s one thing for me to fall for Simon, but it’s quite another if Luke does. If this doesn’t work out …

  “Abigail, will you come with me for a moment?”

  I try to gauge his emotions, but come up empty. His face is completely neutral.

  “Of course. I’ll be right back,” I tell Luke as I follow Simon out of the kitchen and into the hallway. There, he opens a door I haven’t noticed before and leads me into the garage. He must want to talk in private about what just transpired in the kitchen.

  “You don’t have to come,” I murmur. “I mean, it’s not … you know.” I have no idea what I’m trying to say. He turns to look at me, wearing a slight frown.

  “You’d rather I didn’t.” It’s not a question.

  “No, it’s not about me.”

  “Do you think Luke invited me out of obligation, then?”

  I can’t help it. I snort out a laugh, immediately covering my mouth with my hands. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh at you.”

  Thankfully, he doesn’t look upset. “I said something funny?”

  “Well, yes. Luke is four. He doesn’t understand the concept of obligation. He only does what he wants.”

  “Oh.” Simon ponders this for a bit. “So it would hurt his feelings if I didn’t show up?”

  “Yes,” I admit.

  “All right, then. I’ll come,” he says resolutely. “What does he want?”

  “You can give him the iPad you mentioned last night.”

  He shakes his head. “That’s yours to give.”

  “Are you sure? It’s a great gift. He’ll love it.”

  “Which is exactly why you should give it to him, Abigail.” He smiles at me, hesitating for a moment before reaching out to tuck a lock of my hair behind my ear. The tips of his fingers linger against my skin as they trail down my neck, making me shiver. When he touches me like this it feels like so much more than a sexual arrangement. It’s no wonder I’m confused, but I can’t help but think he’s confused too, about his own feelings.

  “Thank you,” I manage. “I’ll think of something, okay?”

  “Okay.” He reaches into his pocket and hands me a set of car keys, sweeping his arm toward a very nice-looking gray car next to his black one.

  Holy shit. “You didn’t buy me a car …” I exhale, trying to get my bearings.

  Simon chuckles. “No, sweet girl. This is my second car. I only use it when the BMW is in the shop. You may borrow it until you can afford your own.”

  “My own car?” I whisper.

  “You do have a license, don’t you?”

  “Oh, yes. I haven’t used it in a while, but I’m a good driver.”

  “Wonderful. Once you’ve saved enough for your own, I’ll be happy to help you pick one out. Until then, you can use this one for driving Luke to and from school and running errands like grocery shopping.”

  “Thank you,” I say, overwhelmed. “Wow, my own car.”

  He watches me, looking pleased. “It would mean a lot to you, wouldn’t it? Buying it yourself, rather than having me simply give you one.”

  I nod my head.

  “I respect that. Despite my preferences in bed, I do like your independence very much, sweet girl. At least some of the time.” He gives me a wink, telling me he’s only half-serious.

  “I like being yours,” I tell him truthfully, gazing up at him. “I like it very much, Sir.”

  “As do I,” he murmurs, stepping closer to me. “I like knowing that you belong to me. That you’re mine.”

  He backs me up against the wall, leaning in to whisper in my ear. “But even more than that, the fact that you want this as much as I do, Abigail, that you get wet at the sound of my voice when I tell you to kneel, to worship me, and that you bend to my will, gladly, that you enjoy it when I take charge of you. It’s …”

  “It-it’s what?” I stutter, feeling my heart hammering in chest.

  “It’s everything.” His lips trace the column of my neck, breathing warm air against my skin. My eyes flutter closed. Suddenly, I can’t wait for tonight.

  “I’m off to work soon, but we’ll continue this later.”

  I open my eyes, blinking as I look up at him.

  He smirks at me. “Have a good day, Abigail.”

  “You too, Sir,” I tell him, willing my body to calm down.

  He reaches out to caress my face, his thumb tracing across my lips before he turns and walks away, seemingly unaffected. I wonder if he’s just good at hiding it, if his heart is perhaps beating as fast as mine underneath his polished surface.

  Drawing a deep breath, I follow him out of the garage and watch as he heads upstairs, his long legs taking two steps at a time with ease, while I stumble into the kitchen and sit down with Luke. A few minutes later, Simon comes back and hands me a note with the school’s information.

  “Thank you,” I tell him. “What would you like for dinner tonight?”

  He smiles. “Whatever you feel like cooking.”

  “I want hot dogs!” Luke volunteers.

  Simon chuckles. “Hot dogs for him, whatever you feel like making for me.”

  I nod my head, returning the smile.

  “Have a good day at school, Luke. Learn a lot,” he says.

  “I’m going to a meeting,” Luke says, sounding awfully precocious.

  Simon grins, holding up his hands. “My mistake. Have a good meeting, young Mister Winters.”

  My son turns to me. “What does that mean, Mommy?”

  “It’s like your grown-up name,” I explain.

  Luke looks very happy hearing that, grinning around his toast as he takes another bite. I stand and indicate with a subtle head tilt that Simon should follow me to the kitchen island.

  “His name is actually Jones,” I admit, “after his father.”

  Simon purses his lips. “Would you like to change that?”

  I chose to give Luke Patrick’s last name at the hospital. At the time it seemed like the natural thing to do, but looking back with the clarity of hindsight, I can see that it was to get Patrick more interested in his infant son since he’d done his best to ignore my pregnancy, never coming with me to ultrasounds and doctor’s appointments. Obviously, it didn’t work, and Patrick was never a good father.

  “Yes, very much,” I tell Simon.

  He nods slowly. “And custody?”

  “I, uh, I don’t know, actually. We were never married. I don’t know how it works.”

  “He just left?”

  “Yeah,” I whisper. “It’s been almost a year now. I don’t know where he is.”

  Simon takes a deep breath, angling his body toward mine. “Do you miss him?”

  “Not even a little bit,” I say without hesitation.

  He looks relieved. “What about Luke?”

  I shake my head. “He really wasn’t … well, I guess some people just shouldn’t have kids.”

  “That’s very true,” he responds, his voice grave. “Some people.”

  I wait for him to continue, but instead he draws a breath and steps away from me.

  “Have a good day,” he says. “You have my number if you need anything, and I’ll see you tonight.”

  “Tonight,” I echo as he leaves the kitchen.

  I look down at the piece of paper in my hand. There’s something I have to do before Luke can start school.

  Half an hour later, I shake out my shoulders and ring the bell next door. Lila appears, her eyes widening at the sight of me and Luke on her doorstep.

  “Hi!” my son says eagerly. “Can J.R. play?”

  “Oh, uh, now?”

  “No, I’m sorry, that’s not why we’
re here,” I interject. “I know it’s early.”

  She laughs, tightening the tie of her robe. “It’s not that early. We’re off to a late start. But please come in.” She calls for her son and as soon as Luke’s boots are off the two of them run off, talking over each other excitedly.

  “Do you want coffee?” Lila asks, showing me into the kitchen. “There’s some already made.”

  “We won’t stay long. I know it’s a school day. But yes, please.” I take a seat and look around the space, admiring how lovely it is, and how lived-in compared to Simon’s house. Lila brings a cup for each of us and joins me at the table.

  “So, this is a surprise,” she says.

  “Uh, yeah.” I take a quick gulp, burning my tongue in the process. “I wanted to clear up some things. Our kids are going to be attending the same school and we live next door to each other. We’re going to be seeing each other all the time and I just—”

  “It’s okay. You and Simon are involved, right?”

  I stare at her, blinking. “No! I-I just work for him. Why would you think that?”

  “I’ve seen you visiting him at night,” she says. “I didn’t recognize you at the park at first, but when you said you were living over there, I put two and two together. You’ve been coming for months, usually around dinnertime.”

  Panic makes my heart pound. My hands feel clammy.

  “We eat early because of J.R,” she continues. “I usually take a walk after dinner and saw the taxis. Please don’t think I spend my nights spying on my neighbors. It’s just that Simon never has any visitors, so I couldn’t help but notice when a cute brunette started showing up. I figured he’d finally gotten a girlfriend.” She takes a sip of her coffee. “But you said you were his housekeeper. Even though I’ve seen him escort you inside, like you were a guest.”

  Escort. Did she use that word on purpose?

  She looks at me again. I swallow nervously, trying to read her, trying to figure out if I can lie my way out of this. I can’t. She knows something is going on, but doesn’t seem unfriendly. I remember her husband joking that she likes to gossip. The last thing I need is her spreading rumors about me and Simon. Maybe I can make her see my side of things.

  “I take care of him,” I hear myself whisper, clutching my cup between my hands.

  She nods slowly. “That’s good. He needs taking care of.”

  I relax a little. “And he takes care of me.”

  “Like the school for your son?” she asks. “I know how expensive it is.”

  I nod, taking a quick sip.

  “I take it the two of you have … an agreement of sorts?”

  “Yes. It works for both of us.”

  At least, it’s been working. Now I know I want more, but I’m not about to push the subject before I sense Simon is ready for it.

  “That’s what I figured,” Lila says.

  “I know what you must think of me,” I whisper.

  “No, you don’t.”

  I look up, surprised by the friendly tone of her voice.

  “I used to model, Abigail. And it’s a dirty business, especially for young girls. I’ve done a lot of things I wish I hadn’t. I’m the last person to judge someone.” She scoffs. “And I did them to get ahead, to get more shoots, to attend parties. It seems so ridiculous now.”

  “I’m sorry,” I offer.

  “I really appreciate you being honest with me, and you don’t have to worry. I’d never say anything about you—or Simon. I like to talk, but despite what my husband says I don’t run with gossip. Not that kind, anyway.” She stirs her coffee.

  “I always wondered about him,” she says thoughtfully. “He’s handsome, obviously, but I’ve never seen him with a woman, or a man for that matter—not even at social functions.”

  “You socialize with him?”

  “We’re at the same club,” she explains. “He’s very courteous, but a complete mystery. We’ve been neighbors for years, you know, but we’ve never moved beyond small talk. The same with my husband. He’s always asking Simon to go golfing with him or play racquetball at the club, but it rarely happens. He mostly keeps to himself.”

  I nod. That was my impression of him too—at first.

  “That’s why I was so surprised when I realized you’d moved in over there. And with a kid!”

  “Oh?”

  “I always got the impression he doesn’t like children at all.”

  I’m not sure he does, either. A vasectomy doesn’t exactly scream kid person.

  “I remember when J.R. was born, and we were out walking with him in the stroller,” she tells me. “Well, we met Simon, and J.R. started fussing, so Dave picked him up. Simon was nice enough, congratulating us and stuff, but when Dave asked if he wanted to hold the baby, it was like he’d asked him to hold a live grenade with how quickly Simon declined. I think he even backed away.”

  Wow. He really doesn’t like children.

  But he does seem to like Luke. Maybe he’s changed since then. I hope he has.

  “Still, there’s something about him, isn’t there?” she muses. “I always felt a bit sorry for him, but I’m not sure why. I’ve tried to set him up with friends of mine, but he declined every time. And I know most of the single women and even a few married ones at the club have hit on him with no luck. So in the end I just figured he liked being a recluse.” She gazes at me. “I was wrong, it seems.”

  “I don’t know about that. He’s really private, but he’s also very kind. Both to me and my son. I was in a really bad situation and he, well, he sort of saved me. I don’t want you to think I’m just using him for his money, or that he’s taking advantage of me. We both want this. I’ve never done anything like this before, and I wouldn’t if I didn’t feel that—” I stop myself, realizing I’m sharing way too much. “Does your husband know?” I ask carefully.

  “No. But even if he did, I don’t think he’d be bothered by it. He knows about my past. I won’t tell him anything if that’s what you’d prefer.”

  “Thank you. Luke would be sad if he couldn’t come over and play with J.R. again, and maybe …”

  “I’d love to hang out again,” Lila says, sending me one of her blinding smiles. “More coffee? Then I can tell you all about the school, and which mom cliques to avoid over there, especially the no-sugar, all-organic ones. Suburbia, man. It’s tough out here.”

  I laugh, holding out my cup. Coming over here was definitely the right move, and I think I just made my first friend in the neighborhood.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  The next two weeks are without a doubt the happiest of my whole life. The school that Luke attends is amazing and he loves going. I was worried he might be behind the other kids, but so far he hasn’t struggled too much with the curriculum, which involves both music and arts besides more academic subjects.

  We’ve quickly fallen into a routine. In the mornings, I pack an afternoon snack for Luke since lunch is included in the program, and then we have breakfast together in the kitchen. After Simon leaves for work, I drop Luke off at school, my heart nearly bursting with happiness as I watch him being greeted by his new classmates. Then I have the whole morning and most of the afternoon to myself, which feels strange, but I keep busy. I handle all of the grocery shopping and meal planning, do the laundry, and make sure the house is kept in order. My afternoons and early evenings are spent with Luke and my nights are spent with Simon. It’s the best of both worlds.

  Simon drew up a contract of employment for me and I signed without hesitation. My salary is good and I don’t pay rent. He insists that I buy all of the food for me and Luke using the card he gave me, so all I really need to pay for myself is stuff like clothes and shoes. I have more than enough to start saving up—and Simon handled that too, in his own efficient way. All it took was a signature from me, and he closed my old account and opened a new one at his bank in my name. My paycheck is deposited there automatically, and I’m the only one who can access it. The days of worry
ing about Patrick taking my money are gone.

  We haven’t been officially moved in for long, but already it feels like home. Our names are on the mailbox, and I’ve received my first letter: the state of Washington has finally started its investigation of Patrick’s abandonment. I’m not sure what this means exactly, but I hope it will lead to my getting full custody of Luke if they can’t track Patrick down. And even if they do find him, I doubt he’d put up much of a fight. We’re doing just fine on our own, thanks to Simon and his generosity.

  Truthfully, he’s spoiling us. Hardly a day has gone by without him bringing home gifts both big and small, from coloring books and crayons for Luke all the way to a beautiful pair of earrings for me. Whenever I’ve tried to thank him, he’s waved it off, usually silencing my words with sweet kisses. It’s no wonder I’m smiling nonstop lately. Most of the time I don’t even think about the fact that I’m here doing a job, and Simon doesn’t feel like my boss. He’s the man I’ve fallen in love with, the one who makes my heart pound faster and my body sing with pleasure every night. He said he doesn’t have much to offer a romantic relationship, but it’s clear to me that he’s wrong about that. I love what we have, what we do together, and every day I feel us growing closer. He sends me texts throughout the day, asking what I’m doing, encouraging me to spend time with Lila and enjoy myself, telling me he can’t wait to come home to me. I stay up with him way past midnight every night, sometimes making sweet love, other times fucking like animals, and sometimes simply cuddling on the couch watching movies. I love all of it. I love him. And I think he might love me too.

  The day before Luke’s birthday is a Friday, and I pick him up early, excited for the weekend. Simon has a dinner thing in the city, so it’s just the two of us this afternoon. After a light snack, we end up watching a movie in his room. As it’s playing, my eyelids grow heavier and heavier. I sink back into the pillows as I hug my son, happy and content.

  I sit up with a start, realizing that I’m alone on the bed. There’s now a blanket covering me and the TV’s off. Luke is nowhere to be seen. I must have fallen asleep.

  “Luke?” I get off the bed and start walking through the house, knowing Luke will be somewhere inside. If he tried to leave, the alarm on the door would’ve gone off. In the empty kitchen, I glance at the clock, wincing as I see that it’s nearly 6:00 p.m. I’ve slept for more than two hours and am now way behind schedule. In the hallway, I pause when I notice Simon’s coat on the hanger. He’s home early and my heart leaps with excitement before I remember I still haven’t found Luke. There’s only one place he could be.